01
For developers
The context layer above the cloud
MCP is the future. We're just not sure what it is yet.
The world's first vertically integrated, space-enabled MCP infrastructure company.
Enterprise phonetics available on demand.
Audio transcript: “McPenis. Mc… Penis… dot A.I.”Backed by several people with podcasts.
Protocol / 01
One protocol.
Infinite explanations.
A unified standard for moving context between systems, decks, and increasingly confident conference panels.
02
For investors
MCP is the API economy, but agentic.
03
For everyone else
It's like USB-C for AI, except you still need seventeen adapters.
Still confused? Good. You're early.
Reference architecture / v0.0.1
Context, at enterprise velocity.
Six layers. Seven arrows. Zero unnecessary clarity.
- 01 Your Data Context becomes actionable.
- 02 MCP Actions become agentic.
- 03 Agent Agentic becomes billable.
- 04 Another MCP Billable becomes recursive.
- 05 Space Recursive becomes orbital.
- 06 Shareholder Value Orbital becomes a seed round.
Orbital infrastructure / 02
Earth-based AI has reached its limits.
Latency. Regulation. Gravity. These legacy constraints are holding back inference. McPenis deploys MCP-enabled agents where compliance teams cannot reach them: low Earth orbit.
Compliance perimeter
Ends at the Kármán line.
- 0
- users
- 14,000 km/h
- deployment velocity
- $6.9M
- seed
- 1
- satellite-shaped Figma mockup
- 100%
- extraterrestrial uptime*
*No infrastructure has been deployed.
Nuclear infrastructure / 03
Context requires power.
Our proprietary Small Modular Context Reactor™ converts enriched narrative into low-latency inference at orbital scale.
- 01Agent-grade fission
- 02Closed-loop context cooling
- 03Zero-carbon token generation
- 04Prompt-critical containment
Patent pending in at least one group chat.
LOT 0001
SEED, 2026
Pre-product organic matter
Capital formation / 04
We raised a Seed.
Our pre-product seed round will accelerate hiring, deepen our commitment to context, and fund a professionally animated product demo.
Engineering10%
Launch party20%
Founder podcast appearances30%
Figuring out what MCP is40%
Investor data room / Unaudited
The metrics speak for themselves. We wrote the script.
A live product, a proprietary benchmark, and institutional-grade annualization—all in one permissionless diligence environment.
ERR_FOUNDER_MACHINE_ASLEEP
localhost refused to elaborate.
The product is live. The founder's laptop is not.
- $18.4MRun-rate ARR
- Annualized from our best eleven minutes.
- 94%*Gross margin
- *Inference is classified as R&D.
- #1McPenisBench™
- Benchmark authored after results arrived.
- 4.8×Round subscribed
- The round has not opened.
- Moat
- A 9,842-token system prompt marked CONFIDENTIAL.
- Model strategy
- Agnostic until one provider extends our free credits.
- Human in the loop
- The founder, on a second monitor.
- Infrastructure
- We call the same API from inside a VPC.
- Enterprise readiness
- The pilot becomes paid when procurement stops asking.
Pricing / 05
Pre-revenue pricing for post-revenue teams.
Prices scale automatically with confidence.
| Plan | Price | Included | Select plan |
|---|---|---|---|
| Flaccid | Free | One context, community latency | |
| Erect | $69/month | Unlimited agents, priority jargon | |
| Enterprise | Let's talk | SSO, SOC 2 roadmap, custom acronym | |
| Orbital Recommended | $420,000/month | Same product, but in space |
All plans include our SOC 2 intention statement.
Market validation / Unprompted
Testimonials
“I still don't know what MCP is, but I've approved the budget.”
“Their architecture slide had seven arrows. We invested immediately.”
“Finally, a protocol with founder-market fit.”
FAQ / Continuously funded
Frequently avoided questions.
Every answer creates two new acronyms and explains nothing.
What is MCP?
Yes.
Does McPenis use the Model Context Protocol?
Our legal team has advised us to say “conceptually.”
Why space?
It increased our valuation.
Is this open source?
The waitlist form is.
Where is my data stored?
In context.
Are you hiring?
We are always hiring a Founding Head of AI Thought Leadership.
Join the context economy
The future is hard.
McPenis is harder.
Join 84,291 visionary early adopters, 84,287 of whom are synthetic.
No email required. No information retained. No product available.